i have just bruised another person's feelings.

my reservations were right.
they are totally the same.
they make it so that,
every single shit in my blog counts.
and every word said or unsaid rather, can somehow make or break.

sometimes i wonder,
whether my own feelings are taken into account.
or am i completely nonchalant,
too indifferent to show the whole world that i can be affected too.
I CAN BE FUCKING AFFECTED ALRIGHT.
of course who wouldnt?
if there is another person who has replace your place now.
if you read about the other friend, the other girlfriend.
if there is someone out there who is apparently better than you.
if your own friend has a million friends out there whom are always mentioned of.

i don't know where i stand really.
i try to give them my best,
but they either push me away, or they expect more.
or worse, sometimes i feel like im being ignored.
so i wonder, am i needed now?
you dont need me right?
you have your other friends.

so now no matter what, im apologising anw.
and it is sincere because im rather pissed off by this behaviour of ours.
sorry i couldnt reply to ure sms.
in case you dont know,
i am using prepaid,
and when you have only $0.01 in your fucking prepaid,
5 cents counts ok.

and dont worry about me,
i am fine.
so you can go off with you other friends now.