do boys feel the same way when they received smses from us? sometimes i would smile and giggle to myself when i receive an sms from him. when my ringtone indicates that he is calling.. my heart starts beating fast. at times, i still feel like a secondary school girl receiving calls from her crush. muahahaha. but the best part is, i always have the habit of calling him at the wrong time.. often when i anticipate hearing his voice telling me he misses me.. i will get a "PALAH I TENGAH BUSY LA!!" instead. i will put down the phone immediately.
i really hate him sometimes.

today we were supposed to go out, but something cropped up last minute and thus we had to cancel our plans. im a bit upset but actually we dont exactly have any plans.. we didnt know what to do. i really wish that singapore would have those kind of normal amusement parks.. the ones that wont burn a hole in the pockets. i want hafiz to bring me on a ferris wheel ride and win me a huge teddy bear. and then we'll eat a huge pink candy floss together... we'll go ride the horses that go round and round.. i dont know whats that called.
or better, i want singapore to have drive-thru cinemas.. we'll munch popcorns and eat hot dogs while we watch the movie in the car.

anyway, watched p.s i love you. i know im abit outdated. it was a nice movie. i cried thirty minutes into the movie. and i continued weeping and weeping.. cos it was so sweet. ive been quite a crybaby these days. i visited my neighbour in hospital and when i saw her, frail and so small on the hospital bed.. tears welled up. i quickly moved to the back of the ward.. before everyone starts staring.

like i mentioned, i have a report to do and everything.. but it was postponed to next next week so i got my butt saved, at least for a while. i just hope i'll pass my mid term maths test and the econs test and the accounts test.. all the tests la.

The Fray - All At Once

There are certain people you just keep coming back to
She is right in front of you
You begin to wonder could you find a better one
Compared to her now she's in question

And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same

Maybe you want her, maybe you need her
Maybe you started to compare to someone not there

Looking for the right one you line up the world to find
Where no questions cross your mind
But she won't keep on waiting for you without a doubt
Much longer for you to sort it out

And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same

Maybe you want her, maybe you need her
Maybe you started to compare to someone not there
Maybe you want it, maybe you need it
Maybe it's all you're running from
Perfection will not come

And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes
We'd never know what's wrong without the pain
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same

Maybe you want her, maybe you need her
Maybe you've started to compare to someone not there
Maybe you want it, maybe you need it
Maybe it's all you're running from
Perfection will not come

Maybe you want her, maybe you need her
Maybe you had her, maybe you lost her to another
To another

less than a week of work and im beginning to think that its a bad idea. why not?!
when you're RE keeps calling and asking whether you can make it to work this day and that day.. if i were to succumb to him, i would have to work the whole of this week now.. except for yesterday. i am schooling for God's sakes!!
i have accounts test next wednesday and up till now, i got no idea how to start answering a question!
and i have a 3000 word report due next 2 weeks!
to top it all, exams is in july!
maybe this is really a bad idea.. i thought that they would be more flexible with students.. i dont end school at 2.. i end at 5! i am so wrong! maybe its the sales period... but whatever it is, 6 out of 7 days working? tt means its 12 hours every freaking day.

what am i supposed to do now?
sigh.

i started work yesterday. it was ok..
i hate to walk all the way to suntec really. it is such a bloody long walk.. what with the city link mall and the new underground pass to suntec city.
seriously can i not work??? it is soo uber tiring to be working and studying at the same time. i just wish that i can just go to school.. and somebody would fund me all the money that i need. why cant money just drop from the sky. or appear out of nowhere.. like under the pillows or in between your favourite book. or even better when you check your savings, the figures would suddenly increase double or triple times.
do i sound like a spoilt brat? or rather a slightly mad kid?

on a lighter note..
i was right, he went to terengganu.
but he is back!
just now, i tested him the psychology test. he is so predictable sometimes. i can almost predict what his answers are... except for the tiger part. why the hell would he choose a tiger? im so not a tiger. and to think of it, he's no elephant either.

i really really miss hafiz. and the thing i hate most when i have to work is that i dont have much time with him. when we were back in school, we would meet before school, meet during break, meet during lunch, meet after school.. and this would happen from monday to friday. and i am still not sick of him. in fact i look forward to going to school everyday!! haha!
but anyway, i block my friday and saturday from work. so that i can finish up all the report writing or whatever assignments that i could possibly have.. and so i can have my well-deserved date with the boy after a hell of a week.
i hope he understands. i hope he knows why im doing all this. and i hope that he is trying his best to make time for us, because i have tried my best too.

i hope that amidst my super tight schedule, i would still have time for my family, girlfriends, for him, for my studies especially and for my prayers too.. now i know why some say that 24 hours a day is not enough.
i think that if i would just need 3 or 4 hours of sleep everyday, i could probably do sooo much more. hah.
sigghs.. so we'll just wait for the weekend.

Labels: hafiz, money, work

gg<5 accepted my part-time application. an im starting on the public holiday. bleah. but i am thankful of course.. although a little part of me still wish that durian shop would just call me to tell when i can start work. heh. dont ask me why.
i didnt get enough sleep yesterday night. the baby sister had fever and was whining the whole night. i had to wake up in between sleep and attend to her. the log sleeping beside me was as alive as a dead corpse and so it was up to me to tend to syarina's whines.

i met the boy yesterday!
to think of it, we didnt do much. went gallivanting around suntec city (and to think that i'll be working there. goodness) we had dinner at far east sakura and then we sipped bubble tea and helped my sister pick out dvds at video ezy. and then he sent me home. and this morning, he drove to somewhere (terengganu i think) with his family for a holiday cum celebration of his brother's birthday.
i miss him, already.
i mean if its a weekday, then i wouldnt mind cos i'll be bogged down with school and all. but its a weekend! and a long one too. sighsigh.

no mood already la.
no mood to start on research paper, although its due in 3 weeks time. and the topic i chose is madness. i mean its interesting but i dont know where i'll get reliable materials and articles for it.
no mood to work cos i know i'll be darn tired at the end of the day and im like wondering whether im able to study then. but if i dont work then i'll have no money. haiyahhh.

Labels: hafiz, syarina, work

i don't know what is the right thing to say or how to make it right anymore. frankly speaking, i would just wish that tears would stop rolling and my sisters would stop watching me cry my eyes out.
i guess its true what they say, the degree of hurt that you feel depends on how much you love that person in the first place.

i am a happy girl today because of a few things..
first and foremost, my father gave me his notebook. so now i have my own notebook to store my what-nots! although it feels quite second-hand, he bought me a wireless connector, a singtel mobile broadband, a notebook skin and the bag to keep it in.. and its pink! i am so thankful of all that!

secondly, yesterday we finally had the date that we've been anticipating for weeks! we had dinner at lau pa sat and then went over to one fullerton to chill. its a pity we didnt have a camera or else i'll force hafiz to take more pictures! as usual some people got quite nervous at first but i think it turned out quite the way they intended at the end of the day. (= i was overall.. quite happy with the progress. reached home near midnight.. thank God the parents were quiet about it.

i cant wait for our next date!! and this time, ain must come too. lets go luge or something, have our picnic date! go beach, play sand! but first i gotta get income!